Monday 29 December 2014

Happy New Year

December is assuredly the most positive time of the year, probably because it's when you start accepting the evolution of past 11 months, it is absolutely astoundingly beautiful yet scary how things changed and you ultimately lived through everything. Irrespective of the hard times, you sit back and realize how right it was and then there is a new beginning waiting for you.
Although, not many would disagree with me that the promises and plans you make in the beginning for the whole new year is no where close to the actual when it ends, because we'll never be ahead of time, not even close.
I feel each year is like a friend, who solely plans and also implements it all, creates and retains memories in its name, does the right thing irrespective of the hurt it causes, because in the end, you'll find yourself in a place where you couldn't plan to be, by yourself. Each year you befriend a number and have it added to your age and memories. Maybe a decade later you'll be like "2010 was the best year for it  made me meet the love of my life" or "The proudest feeling was getting honored with a graduation degree in 2013" or "If it wasn't in 2014 when I moved to this city I'd still be sulking in that restless job." The point is that the contribution of each year to this thing called life is inevitable and equally significant.
Year concept is so beautiful, like it's not too short to lose it's importance nor long enough to lose hope for a fresh start. It's so amazing to be able to genuinely move on with not-even-followed-for-a-month resolutions for life. Maybe it's the hope that keeps us going. I remember how hopeful I was that 2014 was going to be good because it's an even number and now 2015 is going to be so much better because ironically it just doesn't sound that odd. Whatever the number might be, a year will always embark on excitement and end on a contented note of acceptance.
I raise my glass with ecstasy to this very ending year and forthcoming start.
Thank you 2014,You guided me back home.

Thursday 18 December 2014

War against the Unjust

I've been fighting my urge to write this for so long due to paucity of knowledge. I don't think I understand much about these terrorists, politics, religion or anything at all. Honestly, I still don't exactly get what and why this 'Taliban' thing is after an hour of googling, maybe most of so many people who lost their lives of this neither.
I can't recall much from my time though I do have fair flashbacks, in fact we all have that, from 2008 Mumbai Attack, that Virgina Tech shootings, 7/11 Delhi Bombings, then elementary school shootings in Connecticut back in 2012 and so many incidents that our minds fail to retain. And now learning this attack in Peshawar just breaks my heart. I no longer know who I want to pray in front of for those little souls to rest in peace and for those who lost their loved ones to nothing and will never know peace anymore and are just going to fight the rage of helplessness for rest of their lives.
I don't want to refer to the poor laws or any political leaders or parties for not doing anything about it, Maybe they can't help it either, for they are just as destroyable as we are, the normal people. This day, I question the existence of any God at all. I believe this has to be His job to step in and concede justice.
Why is it always the innocent who suffers, not just in attacks but of diseases and accidents too? Why not ever one of the terrorists who are after lives of the innocent, accidentally hit his car and just die? Why aren't they ever the victims of Cancers and tumors because they totally deserve it? Maybe I'm just emotional and naive. But seriously why don't bad things happen to bad people and good things to good? Isn't this the logic? 
And if nothing is fair, What is the whole point of life? or religions or countries or law or anything? Why do we have to live for the day when someone shoots a gun aimlessly in our face and walk past without having to pay for it?
Hard to absorb but this is never getting better, this will never be better. This world is and will always be unfair. Maybe a complete restart of humanity could work or maybe cruelty and humanity go hand in hand.

Monday 8 December 2014

The Unleft

Because I let you take our cat
and upcoming vacation tickets 
and our favorite polaroid 300
and all our stuff, now yours,
leaving nothing to myself
but independence
of starting over
may be a little sadder, but wiser,
after 'we' are hopelessly done
like my shallow crave of growing
an inch or two taller or slimmer,
Not that I don't sense you now
in every sip of our favorite coffee, sadly
the guy at cafe smiles and lifts his heels 
to see from how far you follow me in,
or when I put the same shirt 
I wore the first time you hugged me,
hard to get why it still whiffs of
your bergamot and olive blossom, aroma
that grew on me like a tumor. 
I still see you in my dreams 
laughing with me, sometimes brawiling,
defining and undefining 
the meaning of love.
Each morning tastes of yesterdayness 
and of dreams of betrayal.
I see you through all the places
we explored, the cities we toured to,
those roads now mapped on my palms
to be read like horoscope,
un-do-able. 
Come what may,
I shift from where
You were my way in between 
the rights and wrongs
to some way in between bereft
and the reaches you never left.

Wednesday 3 December 2014

Someday, Maybe

Like one of those flimsy hopes 
that keep us going nowhere,
I secretly believe in coincidences,
and myths of a kind that
world is really a small place.
Like they show in movies
which spoil and grow on us,
that years from now
someday somewhere somehow
We'll find each other again
far away, in a third city
that belongs to neither of us.
I let myself hope that
we'll meet at a coffee shop
sited on a boulevard road,
ordering the same coffee
on a common counter,
Or we'll collide in rain
on a busy road with a hurried crowd 
and we'll find time to
look past to have each other's glance,
Or,
We'll be facing each other
in Coast Starlight, travelling
from Seattle to Los Angeles.
Maybe you'll look at me, 
maybe you'll still remember
how we dreamt of the train together,
maybe we'll fail to smile 
and realize how we never moved on
maybe we could blame time
for not being the right one,
maybe you'll reach to hug 
the emptiness out of me 
may be we'll find 
the long lost love,
maybe we could start over
and guide each other back home.
maybe we could try again,
maybe.